Walking the Talk is Tough

I was going through some of my files recently and came across some notes I had prepared when I participated in an Ethics Panel at a women’s leadership conference. The questions we were asked to consider were:

1. Many people face scenarios where they feel that their personal values don’t necessarily have a place in the corporate culture at work. How do you maintain a balance between personal values and corporate values?
2. Have the two ever been in conflict for you and what would you suggest to help women express their personal values in the corporate/business world?

Sometimes when I speak to groups, I feel like a fraud. I say all the right things and say them articulately, but often, I have a hard a time following my own advice. For example, my answer to the first question was this:

1. “First, you need to be clear on your personal values. If you wait until you’re in the heat of the moment, and faced with an ethical decision, it will be more painful than it needs to be. It helps if your organization has published its corporate values. Then if you see instances where you don’t think these values are being adhered to, you have a place to start a conversation.”

Keep reading. Here was my answer to the second question.

2. “Anyone who has been in the working world for any length of time has faced situations where they’ve faced an ethical dilemma. Before you go rushing in and declaring everyone involved to be a criminal, check:

• Do you know the whole story?
• Are you making assumptions about other people’s motives?
• Are you feeling a tad bit self-righteous?

Then:

• Ask questions, rather than pronounce judgment
• Approach like a scientist rather than a vigilante
• Realize that there is such a thing as humane implementation. (Ford pardoning Nixon)
• Realize there is a middle ground between silence and violence

Don’t:

• Go underground and join the complainers.
• Jump down people’s throats.
• Drop out say “I don’t do politics.”

Pretty good advice if I do say so myself. Now, if only I could follow it. In the past few months, I can think of examples when I’ve violated every single piece of advice listed. What gives? The same thing that causes me to blow my diet, sleep in instead of work out, and watch another rerun of Law and Order instead of writing performance appraisals. Knowing what to do and doing it are worlds apart. So if you catch me not walking my talk, lovingly call me on it and remember: I am a work in progress. Please excuse the mess.